I read back over all the E&B posts so far.

stuff I noted:

My material starts with my body. The ENERGY. energy of the body making an action in relation to the material.

Learn not to see the lemon, but look at the shape of the lemon. This is an approach to help find out what I have to say about this story. I am not seeking to answer questions or deliver outcomes, start thinking about it as a circle, slow it down, its a significant project.

Last week w Moran we talked about the sense of quiet, of charged quietness I encountered in Quin and NewMarket on Fergus. How to bring that quiet into the drawings.

Looking at landscape/space sense of quiet/disquiet.

There is definitely a different way of life in these places than what I know. When you are there, urban spaces, even Ennis, feel so very far away. They have to rely on each other much more and there appear to be strong community links as they literally need them to survive, on a practical level as well as a social one.

Moving on- notes I took when speaking to Moran on Monday morning gone. we covered a lot in this conversation. A lot of it is me trying to interpret Morans language as in how she alludes to stuff. I feel this is part of this whole E&B experience.

Moran’s observations from the 3 previous posts I’d made documenting the work made from visiting Carolin, Veerla in Spanish Point and Ennistymon:

Connotations of animation the large scale roll of sequenced action drawings of Carolin.

Moran specifically mentioned the last paragraph of the last post, where Id said: “Then Id had an idea about trying to convey Carolin’s general strength and ability in her job and surroundings by doing some multiples of her actions on a larger scale. I used a roll of brown paper I had, 75cm deep ,and got 4 images of her down this morning before I had to go.” She spoke of how my practice deals with physical strength and now how to try and link in my practice with how I am seeking to convey Carolin’s general strength and ability. She referred to the more detailed drawing I made of Veerla:

and reminded me of the silent village Id visited (Quin) with its charged emptiness, the sense of quiet energy. She linked it to how Veerla has no neighbours, the relationships she has built to manage how she lives in the quiet, kind of suffocating (to my mind) charged emptiness. Thinking about rural links for companionship and considering how things are represented. Theres an element of strength unique to rural life. The decision to live this way. Veerla and her daughter and friend sat drinking tea and gosssiping:

Gossip = strength. women = strength.

Their appearance. How they look. How they dress. For their jobs and their lifestyles. Moran; their appearance is very deliberate and it fits what they want to be. I think I agree..Thinking about femininity here. I feel like the question of femininity is some thing I have not questioned as such till now. How feminine am I? My own appearance is based around what I don’t want as opposed to what I do. I don’t want the bother and daily distraction of looking after a hairstyle so I shave it off. I detest the possibility of looking like I am trying to be attractive to a certain genre, hence also why the lack of hair forces me to live with the face I see. I don’t wear much makeup as the older I get the more interested I am in living without it, also I can’t be bothered putting it on. I can see my face changing as I get older and I very much want to be present and experience this and not cover it up too much, for some reason. It’s to do with how fast times goes now, how fast the weeks go by. Also if I had a choice between ageing with beauty, or ageing and remaining strong, it’s the latter hands down. A million times over! But then, strength is beauty to me, so i’m killing two birds with one stone. (Such a horrific analogy.)Putting on makeup feels to me a bit like scrolling on social media, it rarely makes me feel good. But I recognise this attitude to my appearance is a strong visual statement in itself. I celebrate others interest in their hair and makeup, and I am my own version of acceptability.

So are these women. Things to consider moving forward. the beolw words will affect the language choices I make moving froward.

My own autobiographical practice

how I portray strength and femininity. a question of strength

busy-quiet. quiet, but loud.

trying to understand how observing others in certain environments can expand my own narrative and practice

Carolin- inhabits the space she works in. physical strength intrinsic to the space and how she inhabits it.

Veerla- wildness reaches right up to her cottage walls. engulfing. she allows this.

try: brown paper roll. put down the rural backgrounds and make representations of the women in the background. use black watercolour as before. Use black pen to highlight the shapes and the background, thinking about the statements above.


either this Friday or next Friday. Probably next Friday as today is Wednesday. As I write this am sat in studio realising I’ve been reading and typing for 90 minutes and have hardly any time left to make. Anyway. for deadline. I need to have arrived at a visual proposal of a language i will use for the show. More of a decision. A presentation of outcomes. How it could/will look like.

Considering that I have already completed a sizeable amount of research and groundwork. I went back over today and read back all the posts. Next to look at the drawings and works again. Do not create any new languages! Work with whats already been made so far. What’s there.

Time to sharpen the visual intention. Gather up my language. Summation: quiet and loudness of the rural. what strength can be, considering my own performance practice. Inhabiting the rural or allowing the rural to inhabit you/ Control of the pen- how the ink on banana paper represents my practice. My point of view on strong femininity. transforming my performative practice into my drawing practice. When making more large scale paper roll drawings, keep in mind: the movement is important but not the end goal. Inhabiting stillness (think of carolin under the huge coastal sky)

6th November, 12pm suggested deadline